We were healthy. We were normal. There was no reason to think our issue was anything other than timing. So we kept trying, thinking that at some point we’d get the timing down and find success. But that day never came. About 6 years into our marriage, we followed the advice of friends and sought medical help from a big box fertility clinic in our area. After a battery of tests, they relegated us to the category of ‘unexplained infertility’ and urged us to jump straight to IVF – no explanation of test results, no discussion of other options. This seemed wrong to us – it made us feel like just another number. At that point we decided that if it was God’s will, we would get our family – and if it wasn’t, we would continue to live a happy and fulfilled life together.
Fast forward to late Fall 2022 – John and I had a very emotional conversation about life and family. Although we had agreed years before that we would be happy with our lives with or without children, it had become increasingly clear that we weren’t ready to give up on our dream of a family just yet. We knew one thing for sure, however, we weren’t going to go back to the big box clinic – we were going to research other notable and more boutique-like clinics within a reasonable distance from our home in Northern Virginia. That is when we found Dr. Sharara and the Virginia Center for Reproductive Medicine (VCRM).
We booked our first consultation appointment with VCRM in early 2023. Dr. Sharara started by asking questions about our journey, previous tests and procedures we’d had done, our end goal, timeline – he wanted to get to know us as people, not just another number. Then, and most importantly, he told us we weren’t alone – to say the relief of hearing that simple statement felt like a weight off our backs is an understatement. We. Weren’t. Alone. That solidified it for us. We were going to do whatever Dr. Sharara and his staff told us to do – we trusted he’d help us get our family started. John and I both went through a battery of tests and bloodwork, so when Spring 2023 rolled around, we started getting answers. I was diagnosed with PCOS, insulin resistance, and had a couple polyps growing. I was prescribed meds to get the PCOS and insulin resistance under control, put on an infertility diet, and scheduled for a couple procedures to get my body ready for the next steps.
We met with Dr. Sharara again to discuss our options – unlike our previous experience, he didn’t jump straight to IVF. He reminded us that we were still young and had plenty of time to try less invasive options before trying IVF – so that’s what we did. Now, it’s important to note, at this point I was 100% onboard. John still had some reluctance with the process and overall cost (the cost is a hard pill to swallow, as it was not covered by insurance when we first started). After months of inactivity (on our part) and a couple conversations between John and me, I scheduled him for one more consultation with Dr. Sharara. In November 2023, John met with Dr. Sharara and laid out all his questions, and like Dr. Sharara does, he gave it to him straight. He answered every question, every doubt, backed up his answers with research and statistics (John is a numbers guy, so this helped immensely). So, in December 2023, we began our first IUI cycle.
The next 5 months were a blur of medications and failed IUI cycles. We had given it a shot, but it was time to move onto IVF. We had a consultation with Dr. Sharara to go over what IVF was and what all it entailed. We also had a consultation with Trisha, VCRM’s insurance and finance guru, to discuss the financial implications associated with IVF. We started IVF meds in July 2024 with our egg retrieval at the end of August. At that point, the waiting game (and anxiety) began – the eggs were fertilized, the total number of eggs dropped. The eggs grew to blastocysts, the total number of eggs dropped again. Through each milestone, nurses Jill and Jessica calmed our anxiety, explaining that the decreases were normal for each stage. Then, we sent our remaining embryos off for PGT-A testing – more waiting. Once the results came back, we were ready to get started with our frozen embryo transfer (FET)…or so we thought.
Because of my history with polyps, Dr. Sharara wanted to do one more scan of my uterus before proceeding with our FET. Not only did he find a couple polyps, but he also discovered that my uterus was somewhat septate (very often hard to see and diagnose), meaning a wall of tissue had essentially divided my uterus into two, increasing the likelihood of miscarriage by 40% if we had proceeded with the FET before fixing it. So, on Halloween 2024, I underwent a polypectomy and a procedure to fix my uterus. One important note: When you’re a patient of VCRM, you gain access to Dr. Sharara’s network of doctors, surgeons, anesthesiologists – people he has worked with for decades – people he knows, and trusts will do everything they can to make sure you receive the best care. You won’t find that anywhere else.
After taking time to heal, we were finally ready to schedule our first FET. On January 17, 2025, our very first embryo was transferred! Man, it felt good to get to that point. We were flying high on hope when our first hcg test came back ‘pregnant’. For the very first time, in almost 14 years, I was pregnant. Early. But pregnant, nonetheless. And then I wasn’t. At the next blood draw, my numbers started to tank – we had some things going on in our personal lives that really affected my mental and physical health. The transfer failed. The VCRM folks were amazing – I think they wanted this pregnancy to stick more than John and me. They comforted us when we came into the office to discuss next steps.
To ensure there weren’t additional factors at play, we decided to do a little more testing before starting on our next FET. In February I underwent an ERA to rule out endometriosis and a Receptiva biopsy to ensure my endometrial lining was receptive to progesterone. A couple weeks later, the results came back normal, so we agreed to schedule another FET. On April 17th, we transferred our second embryo. This time the embryo didn’t implant at all, so we waited for my new cycle to start. After the second failed transfer, we met with Dr. Sharara to discuss our options before moving forward – he wanted us to have all of the facts before making a decision. We agreed that for our third transfer, he was going to transfer two embryos. So on June 4th, we transferred embyros three and four and hoped for the best. On that day, Dr. Sharara said “you realize, if I transfer two, you’re going to get two.” And boy was he right! My hcg numbers doubled and tripled as they should – I was officially pregnant! This time, my numbers were much stronger and steadily increasing. At our first ultrasound (6wks), the very first words out of Dr. Sharara’s mouth were “I told you…if I transfer two, you’re going to get two.” It was confirmed! We were having twins! John was speechless.
Two years (collectively) after starting this fertility journey with Dr. Sharara and the VCRM team, we are finally pregnant – doubling the size of our little family! We cannot thank them enough for the care and support they have provided throughout our journey. Unlike the big box clinics, they knew us by name – they knew what was going on in our lives. Which meant the world to us! The difference between the big box fertility clinics and VCRM is vast. At VCRM you work directly with the doctor and medical staff. If you have questions for the nurses, you call and talk to the nurses – you’re not confined to a patient portal with a 24-48 hour electronic response time. Most importantly, you get answers. If we had stuck with our big box fertility clinic, we never would have known about my diagnoses – all of that money for IVF essentially getting us nowhere. Without answers you’re set up for failure. Not at VCRM. They give you information, empower you to make the right decisions for you and your family, and encourage you throughout the process. The IVF journey is already riddled with enough pain and isolation – Dr. Sharara and the VCRM team do their best to make the process a little easier. A little less daunting. And for that, we are eternally grateful! We absolutely made the right decision choosing VCRM and are so thankful we did!